Where to Relax?

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Maybe you feel chronic anxiety.  Because of that, maybe you’ve looked into material on the relaxation response before–maybe you’ve poked around on The4thR.com and you’ve liked what you’ve read; you’ve said “yes” to the Faith Factor, to techniques for eliciting the relaxation response, and, in theory, to the idea of a daily relaxation routine.  But there’s one thing you haven’t said “yes” to, yet; there’s one thing that’s keeping you from starting to transform your life and to say goodbye forever to crippling forms of anxiety and stress.  In your hectic life, you say to yourself, you simply don’t know where you can go to relax.

This isn’t a trivial problem.  Around the world–and especially in major urban areas–overcrowding, noise, and a hectic pace of like make it difficult to find places outside the home simply to sit back and do nothing for fifteen or twenty minutes a day.  Even inside the home, there are distractions: maybe you live with roommates, or you have a spouse, partner or children who are always putting demands on your time.  If you live alone, you may be no better off, considering how cell phones, the Internet and mass media make it easier than ever before for friends or employers to call you and distract you, or for you to simply distract yourself.

But pervasive as these problems are, you can’t let them stop you.  According to Dr. Herbert Benson, author of “Beyond the Relaxation Response” and a pioneer in relaxation therapy, the body and mind aren’t as independent of one another as many traditional schools of Western medicine would have us all believe.  Rather, the body and the mind are intimately linked, which means that problems in the body can affect the mind and vice versa.  If you’ve ever been ill with the flu and felt depressed because of it, you’re no stranger to one side of this phenomenon.  But the other side of the mind-body link means that mental disturbances–among them stress and anxiety–can have an effect on the body as well.  In some cases this can lead to a weakened immune system, causing illness and chronic pains that just make you feel ultimately worse.

So it’s crucial to find a way to beat stress and anxiety, which means it’s crucial to find a place where you can relax.  All right, I agree with this, you say, but where am I supposed to go?

For one, try a local park.  It’s no accident that major urban areas tend to have a large amount of land set aside for parks and other nature reserves: cities are hectic and stressful for anyone, and the human mind wants someplace to go where it can get away from it all for a few minutes or hours.  Take advantage of this particular aspect of city planning, and take a trip to your local park.  Consider making a day of it: bring a picnic lunch, a good book, even a kite or a swimsuit for sunbathing.  Above all, bring a blanket you can sit on.  Find a good, reasonably isolated spot, spread out your blanket and take a seat.  Before doing anything else, run through your relaxation exercises: breathe deeply, recite your mantra, relax your muscles, the whole bit.  Don’t worry if people are around–it’s a public park; what do they care, anyway?  Let fifteen to twenty minutes go by–or more if necessary–before you get up to do whatever else you plan to do on your day out.  It’s a sure thing that whatever you’re doing, you’ll enjoy it far more once you’re relaxed.

If a park doesn’t sound appealing, what about a quiet part of a building or office?  As hectic as the modern world may seem, there are always large parts of any building that go unused for much of the day: lobbies, conference rooms, stairwells, parking garages, even out-of-the-way bathrooms.  Chances are that if you work in an office or live in an apartment building, there’s a large, isolated area just a few feet away from you.  What’s to stop you from using that as a place to relax?  There are some advantages: for one, places like this are convenient, and for another, quiet areas in privately-owned buildings don’t have much relation to the parts of the building where you live or work, meaning that you won’t be reminded so often of your demands and obligations while you relax.  

There are disadvantages too, particularly if you’re anxious about being found and possibly made fun of while you’re in the middle of your relaxation exercises.  But if that happens, just tell whoever it is what you’re doing and invite them to come back to the place some other time to do some relaxation of their own–chances are, if anyone’s crotchety and stressed-out enough that they feel the need to hassle you about where you choose to relax, they could stand to benefit from a little relaxation.

There are plenty of other possibilities, with a little imagination.  So what’s your excuse?  Find a good spot, take a seat, and don’t hesitate to get started on your journey toward decreased stress and greater happiness, day by day.

The 4th R is a resource and training center for learning how to relax based in South West London. It was founded by Charles Moore, whose health flourished under his own innovative application of relaxation techniques based upon the MythoSelf® Process.

For more articles or information visit
www.the4thr.co.uk
info@the4thr.co.uk

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