Stress from seperation from partner

• Write about it - The value of a journal can not be overstated. By taking the time each day to write down your feelings about the separation, you will be able to look at your current situation and vent any frustrations that you might be having. A good technique is to give yourself a certain number of pages or minutes to write without stopping to censor what you're saying.

• Remove the reminders - When you're dealing with a separation, reminders of your relationship can cause you to feel like you're rubbing salt in your wounds. For the time being, remove those pictures, mementos and knick knacks from your sight. You don't have to get rid of them, but putting them away can help you focus on your life at the present time instead of the past.

• Take time to breathe - It's easy to focus on the pain of a separation when there's no time for what you're feeling. A classic tip in relaxation training is to take five minutes a day to simply sit and breathe. You want to try to empty your mind as much as possible during this time, making this a sort of gift that you give to your mental state.
  

• Get distracted - Focusing so much on your loss can create more intense feelings of separation. Instead, try to get out and do something that requires your full mental focus, i.e. sports, movies, theatre, shopping, etc. When you do something that takes your mind off things, you can begin to live your life instead of dwell on the bad things that are happening.

• Affirming yourself - Affirmations are classic relaxation techniques that will allow you to recreate the thoughts in your mind. Try telling yourself over and over that ‘things will be fine' and ‘I'm okay right now and at peace with what is happening.'

Separating from a partner might be a temporary situation or it may be the first step toward a complete dissolution of a relationship. In any case, managing your stress will allow you to come through the time in a more peaceful and grounded manner.

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Relaxation Training specialists, The 4th R, 020-8974-8974