Stress from the death of a friend

Create a memorial for them

This can be a memorial at their graveside or in some other special place. What you're doing is creating a physical space for you and your friend to share, even though they're gone. In many cases, death's pain is caused more by the loss of physical presence than anything else. We want to be able to see/feel/touch our friend again. By creating a memorial, you will begin to recreate sense of that presence. You can place pictures, mementos, and whatever else reminds you of your friendship.

Write down a story of your friendship

We sometimes think that trying to dismiss thoughts of our loved one will help us manage our stress and our pain, but in reality, that simply pushes those feelings back, making them more concentrated. To help let go of your pain and come to terms with the death, you may want to try to write the story of your friendship - how it began, the good times, the arguments, etc. This doesn't have to be anything that you show to anyone, but it will be a lovely way to remember your friend when you're missing them. You can pull out this story and read it over and over.

Keep your shared activities

If you used to go to pottery classes together, continue to do so. Whatever small things you used to share before your friend's death, try to continue them now. And if there were things that you always talked of doing, why not do these things now as a way to celebrate your friend?

Promote a shared cause

Nothing helps pain more than giving yourself to a cause that your friend would have supported. Walk for a cause, donate money, or simply help clean up a park. It doesn't matter what you do, it's just that you do something to give your energy to help others in their memory.

Carry a token

It can be a picture or a note that they gave you. Try to carry something with you that will remind you of your friend so that whenever you feel sad, you can turn to it and remember times that were happier. It will serve as a constant reminder that your friend would want you to be happy, even now.

Losing a friend is a painful experience and rightfully so. But when it starts to interfere with your life, you need to ask yourself if that's what your friend would have wanted for you. Probably not. Instead, try some of these tips to lessen the pain without forgetting a second of your friendship.

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