Stress from child leaving home

Realise that you might have strong emotions

Too often we deny the idea that we will feel something about certain events in our life. But by recognising that we might become upset, we allow the feelings to happen without being more stressful to our health. If you have feelings that are arising after your child leaves home or as they are leaving home, allow yourself to feel them. Allow yourself to express those emotions in any way that makes sense to you.

Know that your child is dealing with stress too

If your child has been living at home for a long time, this transition is not going to be easy for them either. They might be dealing with feelings of insecurity and stability. Instead of thinking that this time is going to be worse for you, remember that there are many people involved and that by talking to each other and communicating honestly, you'll all make it through.

Try to limit your calls to check in

The reason why a child leaves home is to gain independence, so you need to realise that calling every day is not helpful. Try to limit your calls and your e-mails to once or twice a week so that you can both get used to the idea of not always being able to talk to each other. Independence for the parent is learned in this situation as well.

Find ways to fill your time

Without the responsibility of caring for your child, you may find yourself with a lot of time on your hands. Instead of sitting around, missing your child, take this time to learn about your own interests outside of being a parent. Take those piano lessons or learn to knit. Try to find ways to occupy yourself so that you're not dwelling on your stressful feelings.

Meet with other child-free parents

You're not the first parent to go through this situation and you will certainly not be the last. To help you find out what to expect from this time in your life, talk with other parents that have been in your shoes before. This will help you realise that you're normal and that you will find a way to cope with this new way of life.

And your child can always visit.

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Relaxation Training specialists, The 4th R, 020-8974-8974